The Amish Nanny Read online

  She stopped in the roadway and clasped her arms across her middle as she closed her eyes. Images of her uncle raising his wooden rod to strike her flashed into her mind and she braced for the blow. Was Micah’s uncle as cruel as hers had been? It wasn’t likely, but what if he was?

  “What is it, Clara?”

  Clara opened her eyes and saw the concern on her friend’s face. She drew a shaky breath. That part of her life was over. She and her three sisters were safe. Their uncle couldn’t hurt them anymore. She had to remind herself of that fact every day. After years of fear and meekness, of striving desperately to please her uncle and failing, it was sometimes hard to believe God had finally answered her prayers. Was Micah praying for deliverance from his uncle’s wrath, too? She had to know.

  She couldn’t leave without knowing.

  “Faith, would you mind if we called it quits early today?”

  “Of course not. Are you okay?”

  “I’m fine. My sisters are putting up corn this afternoon. I know they could use my help. I’ll walk home from here.”

  “It will take more than one day to put up corn for your family. Take tomorrow off, too. Why don’t we get together again on Saturday?”

  Clara took two steps backward. She wanted to race back to the Gingerich farm, but she didn’t want to arouse Faith’s suspicions. “Are you sure you want me to come back? We’ve only a few more hours of spinning to do, and then we’ll be done with this year’s fleece.”

  “Please do come. I’ve enjoyed working with you so much. I want one last day together even if it’s only for a few hours.”

  “All right. I’ll see you Saturday morning.” Clara turned and hurried back the way they had come, but instead of going home, she stopped at the bend in the road that led to Ethan’s farm.

  She rubbed her damp palms on the sides of her dress. What reason would she give for returning? She could hardly tell a man she’d just met that she feared he beat his children. Even if she saw him punishing Micah, what right did she have to interfere? None.

  Yet how could she stand by and do nothing? It was partly her fault the boy was in trouble. If only she knew what was happening to the child.

  Ethan might be a kind and fair guardian. Her Amish faith dictated that she see only the good in every man until shown otherwise. She certainly had no business suspecting Ethan Gingerich of evil, but she had to know that Micah was all right. Her life and her sister’s lives might have been so much better if someone had cared enough to check on them.

  None of them had admitted their abuse to anyone. They had been too ashamed to speak of it. Only her sister Lizzie had been strong enough to break the pattern by running away. She found a wonderful home for them with their grandfather. She freed them all and saved Clara from being forced to marry an odious man.

  She shuddered at the thought of what her life might have been like without her sister’s bravery. God put more courage in Lizzie’s little finger than Clara had in her whole body.

  She glanced at the cornfield separating her from Ethan’s home. She might not be brave, but a child’s welfare could be at stake. She couldn’t turn away from that.

  Gathering what small courage she possessed, Clara moved off the road and into the cornfield beside the lane. The tall green stalks would hide her from view. If her suspicions were groundless, Ethan need never know she had come back to check on him.

  The corn patch ended a few dozen yards from the back of the house. With her heart pounding in her throat, she ran across the open strip of grass and flattened herself against the back wall of the house. Had she been seen? She waited for sounds of discovery.

  It was the height of summer, so the windows were all open to catch the slightest breeze. She heard the sound of voices coming from the window near the north corner of the building. Ducking low, she passed beneath one window and stopped under the next. Two more steps would put her beside the front porch. She thought the kitchen must be on the other side of the wall where she crouched.

  “I’m asking for an explanation, Micah. Now’s your chance to set the record straight.”

  Only silence followed Ethan’s words. She strained to hear Micah’s reply.

  “What were you thinking?”

  Clara nearly jumped out of her skin. Ethan had moved to stand beside the window where she was hunkering. He was directly above her. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to breathe.

  Please, Lord, don’t let him see me.

  Finally, she heard heavy footsteps moving away, followed by the scrape of a chair across the floor. She took a badly needed breath. Ethan said, “Micah, what am I to do with you?”

  “Are you going to send me away?”

  It was the first she had heard from the boy. He didn’t sound as if he was in pain, but she heard the worry under his words.

  “Nee.”

  “Because no one wants me?”

  “Why do you say that?”

  “I overheard Great Aenti May say that she would take Lily if Great Aenti Carol would take Amos. Neither of them wanted to take me.”

  Clara pressed a hand to her lips. The poor child. To know he wasn’t wanted had to hurt deeply.

  Ethan cleared his throat. “I’m not sending any of you away. Your papa wanted all of you to stay together. Your actions today show your disrespect for his memory more clearly than words. How would he feel if Mrs. Lapp came to him to complain you injured one of her animals? Your papa loved animals.”

  Why didn’t Ethan tell the boy he wanted him? It was what the child needed to hear. Clara knew how it felt to be unwanted and unloved. Her heart broke for Micah.

  “I reckon I’d get a spanking for what I did.”

  “I reckon you would if he was here. Go to your room and think on how disappointed he would be with you. Send your brother and your sister down. You will sit and reflect alone and in silence.”

  “They aren’t upstairs.”

  “Are you sure?”

  “I checked before you came in.”

  “Where are they?” Ethan demanded.

  “I don’t know.”

  A chair scraped again. “Lily! Amos! Where are you?” There was an edge of panic in Ethan’s voice. She heard his boots pounding up the stairs inside.

  He wasn’t going to beat Micah. She’d put herself in this foolish position for nothing. Now was her chance to leave, but what if he looked out one of the upstairs windows and saw her running across the lawn? Should she risk it? Could she make the cornfield before she was spotted?

  Suddenly, she heard a childish giggle that was quickly smothered. It came from under the porch. Clara noticed a small opening in the latticework where the porch met the house. Looking through the gap, she saw a little girl of about four sitting cross-legged in the dirt with her hands clasped over her mouth. A boy a little older was seated behind her.

  Taking her hands away from her mouth, the little girl pouted. “Oh, you found us.”

  “What are you doing under there?” Clara whispered. She could hear Ethan calling for them from the upstairs.

  “We’re playing hide-and-seek. We’re hiding from Onkel Ethan.”

  That was exactly what Clara wanted to do. She heard his footsteps pound down the stairs. Now was her chance to run. “Micah, check out back,” he yelled.

  No! If Micah was out back, she couldn’t pass him without being seen, and he was certain to recognize her.

  In a few seconds, Ethan would be on the front porch. He was sure to check along this side of the house. He would find her snooping like a thief outside his home. How would she explain herself?

  She couldn’t. There was only one choice.

  She smiled at the two children and pleaded, “May I join your game?”

  They nodded. She quickly wiggled into the opening and held her breath as the
front door banged open above her.

  Chapter Two

  Ethan came out onto his front porch and stood with his hands on his hips as he scanned the yard for the missing children. How could they disappear so quickly? He couldn’t keep an eye on them every minute. How did mothers manage when they had half a dozen or more to keep track of every day?

  He’d seen both Amos and Lily less than an hour ago. They had been playing on the swing set in the backyard until he sent them inside to clean their rooms. In the meanwhile, he’d gone out to care for his horses. Then he had been sidetracked by Faith Lapp and her pretty, shy friend Clara.

  He called for Amos and Lily again but got no answer. Where should he search first? The barn? The henhouse? The creek? Where would a five-year-old and a four-year-old decide to go without telling him?

  “Do you see them?” Micah asked as he came jogging around from the back of the house.

  “Nee. Do you have any idea where they might be? Did they go with you to the Lapp farm?” He would send Micah back to the neighbors and enlist their aid if he couldn’t find the children soon.

  Please, Lord, don’t let anything have happened to them.

  “I went by myself. I didn’t want them tagging along,” Micah said.

  “Are you sure they didn’t follow you?”

  The boy shrugged. “I guess they could have, but I didn’t see them.”

  “You go check the henhouse and the other outbuildings. I’ll check the barn. Maybe they’re playing up in the hayloft and can’t hear me calling.”

  “I thought you wanted me to go to my room.”

  Ethan scowled at his nephew in renewed annoyance. “After we find your brother and sister.”

  “They’re probably just hiding from you.”

  That took Ethan aback. “Why would they hide from me?”

  “Because they like to play hide-and-seek.”

  “Since when?”

  “Since always. You just never pay attention to them.” Micah jumped off the porch and strode toward the henhouse.

  Ethan raked a hand through his hair. The boy was right. He paid attention to his horses and to his work. He loved his brother’s children, but he didn’t know them. He headed toward the barn and prayed the two little ones hadn’t gone to the Lapp farm. He really did not want to face Faith and Clara again with more of his wayward children in tow.

  * * *

  Through the white painted latticework that bordered the porch, Clara watched Ethan enter the large red barn that stood fifty yards east of the house. The moment he was out of sight, she wiggled backward from beneath the porch. She motioned to the two children to come out, as well. “The game is over now. Your onkel is worried because he can’t find you. I want you both to wait for him on the porch steps.”

  The little boy frowned and shook his head. “He didn’t say alle alle achts und frei.”

  How could he call for everyone to come in because they were free? The poor man wasn’t aware that the game was on. How long would the pair have remained hidden? She didn’t want Ethan to find out. “I will say it. Alle alle achts und frei.”

  “We won.” Lily beamed as she crawled out. She was covered with dirt and cobwebs. Her brother followed her in a similar state. Clara suspected that she looked the same.

  “Ja, you won. You found the perfect hiding place.” Were these little ones scared of Ethan? Was that why they were hiding?

  Clara brushed them off as best she could and glanced toward the barn. There was no sign of Ethan, but he could reappear at any moment. “Why were you hiding from your onkel?”

  “’Cause we like to play hide-and-seek.”

  “Why didn’t you tell him you were playing with him?”

  “I told him I wanted to play hide-and-seek,” Amos said, but his gaze was on his bare toes.

  “And what did he say?” she prompted.

  “He said to clean our rooms,” he admitted.

  “We did and then we hid,” Lily added with a grin.

  Clara glanced toward the barn again. She had to get going. “Next time, you must make sure he knows he is playing the game before you hide.”

  “We will,” Lily said with a nod.

  Clara smiled at her. “Promise you’ll stay on the porch until your onkel returns?”

  “We promise,” Amos said.

  Lily nodded solemnly. “Will you come and play with us again?”

  “Maybe, but today is our little secret, right? We won’t tell anyone about our hiding place.”

  “We won’t tell,” Amos assured her.

  “Danki.” Clara couldn’t waste any more time. After checking and not seeing Ethan or Micah, she scurried around the corner of the house and ran across the lawn into the cornfield. She pushed through the thick green leaves and between the stalks as she rushed on. Even when she reached the road, she didn’t slow down until she was a good half mile away from the farm.

  A stitch in her side finally brought her to a halt. She looked back as she struggled to catch her breath. There was no sign of Ethan Gingerich. She was safe.

  Grateful to escape from an extremely embarrassing situation of her own making without being discovered, she breathed a silent prayer of thanks. Just the thought of Ethan finding her lurking under his porch made her cringe. She wouldn’t have had to worry about keeping her dignity intact because she would have died of embarrassment on the spot.

  It would have served her right to be found hiding like a mongrel dog. She had doubted the goodness of Ethan Gingerich. To do so was wrong and showed the weakness of her faith. It was something she strived to overcome with prayer, but she had a long way to go.

  Not all men were like her uncle and the ruthless man he tried to make her marry. Ethan wasn’t cruel. He might not know how to handle the children, but he wasn’t unkind to them.

  She glanced over her shoulder once more and began walking quickly toward her grandfather’s sheep farm. She hadn’t told the children her name. She had to pray they wouldn’t figure out who she was and tell Ethan about her actions. Hopefully, she wouldn’t have to face him again for a long, long time.

  * * *

  When Ethan came out of the barn after checking every hiding place he could think of he saw Lily and Amos sitting on the front steps of the house. They were safe. He strode toward them, his relief quickly turning to frustration and annoyance. He had wasted a large part of his morning dealing with first one child and then the others.

  He stopped in front of the steps and crossed his arms. “Where have you been? Didn’t you hear me calling you?”

  Lily and Amos exchanged guilty glances. Amos said, “We heard you.”

  “Why didn’t you answer me?”

  “That’s not the way to play the game,” Lily explained.

  Ethan gave her a stern look. “Exactly what game were you playing? Give Onkel Ethan gray hair?”

  Lily shook her head. “I don’t know that game.”

  Ethan drew a hand down his face to wipe away his grin. He struggled to keep a firm tone. “Were you playing hide-and-seek?”

  She smiled brightly. “Ja, and we won.”

  Amos grinned, too. “You never found us.”

  “The next time you decide to play hide-and-seek you must make sure that I know you’re playing.”

  The smile vanished from Lily’s face and she sighed heavily. “That’s what our friend said.”

  Amos elbowed her in the side. “That’s a secret.”

  Her eyes widened and she clapped a hand to her mouth. “I forgot,” she mumbled.

  Ethan glanced around for another child but didn’t see one. “Was there someone else playing with you? Who was it?”

  Amos pressed his lips into a thin line and folded his arms tightly. Lily glanced at him and did the same.
/>   Baffled by their refusal to answer him, he stared at their set faces. Should he demand they tell him who else was playing with them? Did it matter? It did if a child was hiding somewhere and his or her parents didn’t know where. He would have to try a different tactic.

  He glanced at the position of the sun in the sky. “It’s almost lunchtime. Are you two hungry?”

  “I sure am.” Amos jumped to his feet.

  “Me, too. Can we have macaroni and cheese?” Lily asked.

  “I reckon that’ll be as good a meal as any.” It was something he could fix without much fuss. Thankfully, the children hadn’t tired of it.

  “Yum!” Lily’s big grin sent warmth shooting through his chest. She was an adorable child. She looked so much like her mother. It was up to him to see that she grew into a modest and devout woman, too. The thought filled him with dread. He had no idea how to accomplish that feat.

  “Will your friend want some, too?” he asked, casually glancing around again for another child.

  “She’s gone home,” Lily said, heading toward the door.

  Micah ambled across the yard and stopped beside Ethan. He shoved his hands deep in his pockets. “I see you found them. Are you going to give them a spanking?”

  Lily spun around looking horrified. She held her hands over her backside. “I don’t want a spanking.”

  Ethan shook his head. “No one is getting spanked. But Micah is going to his room to think about what he did wrong today. After lunch, you little ones can go play on the swings, but I don’t want you to leave the backyard without telling me. Is that understood?”

  They both nodded solemnly, but he had to wonder as he held open the door for them just how long they would remember his instructions.

  * * *

  Clara sat in Faith’s workroom on Saturday morning and spun the final carding of fleece into fine strands of yarn. She glanced out the window, but the branches of the tree overhanging the alpacas’ pen were empty. The animals grazed peacefully beneath it.